What is Domestic Violence?
Domestic violence is a violent confrontation between members of the same family or household that involves physical harm, sexual assault, or fear of physical harm. These episodes are often repeated, tend to escalate over time, and are designed to intimidate, manipulate, and control the victim. Domestic violence occurs among people of all races, ages, socio-economic backgrounds, occupations, and religious affiliations. These behaviors are not attributable to drugs, alcohol abuse, or the behavior of the victim. Domestic violence is against the law in the state of Arizona.
Domestic violence is a serious problem in the United States. In fact, domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of fifteen and forty-four in the United States - more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. See "Violence Against Women, A Majority Staff Report," Committee on the Judiciary, United States Senate, 102nd Congress, October 1992, p. 3. Three to four million women in the United States are beaten in their homes each year by their husbands, ex-husbands, or male lovers. "Women and Violence," Hearings before the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee, August 29 and December 11, 1990, Senate Hearing 101-939, pt. 1, p. 12. Furthermore, about one out of every four women are likely to be abused by a partner in her lifetime. Sara Glazer, "Violence, Against Women" CO Researcher, Congressional Quarterly, Inc., Volume 3, Number 8, February, 1993, p. 171. There is no reason to believe that these statistics are any better in Arizona. In fact, domestic violence is often correlated to stress, so it is likely that domestic violence is becoming more prevalent in today's difficult economic times.
Warning Signs
Many behaviors are considered to be warning signs of domestic violence or domestic abuse. Physical behaviors indicative of domestic violence include hair pulling, biting, shaking, pushing, pinching, choking, kicking, confinement, slapping, hitting, punching, using weapons, forced intercourse, unwanted sexual touching in public or in private, and deprivation of food or sleep. Emotional abuse is also associated with domestic violence, and includes such behaviors as insults in public or private, putting down friends and family, making the victim feel bad about him/herself, calling names, playing mind games, making the victim think s/he is crazy or guilty, humiliation, treating the victim like a servant, and making all of the big decisions for the household without input from the victim. Economic abuse is another warning sign. Economic abuse includes preventing one person from being employed, making the victim ask for money, taking the victim's money, giving the victim an allowance, denying access to family income or demanding exclusive control over household finances, and not consulting the victim about important financial decisions.
Coercion and threats are also associated with domestic violence and include such behaviors as threatening to leave or to commit suicide, threatening to harm the victim, children, or pets, or to force the victim to engage in illegal actions. Intimidating behaviors, such as brandishing weapons, destroying property, dangerous driving, abusing pets; and isolating behaviors, such as limiting outside contact by any means, are also common. Batterers also often engage in blaming actions, such as claiming that the victim is over-reacting, the victim caused the behavior, accusing the victim of being unfaithful, or denying that the incident occurred.
What to Do if You are a Victim
1. Call 911. Report the incident, and keep the report number with other important records.
2. Seek medical treatment if necessary. Have any injuries photographed and documented.
3. Go to a safe place.
4. Talk to someone you care about. Seek the support of your loved ones to cope with the abuse.
If You Are a Victim & Want to Leave
You deserve to live a life free of abuse. If you choose to end an abusive relationship, there are several steps you can take to protect yourself and the children. If you remain in the residence you previously shared with your batterer, change the locks on the windows and doors of the residence. Install motion sensor lights outside. Alert neighbors or landlords that you have ended the relationship and ask them to notify you and the police if they spot your batterer close to your residence. Contact your child's school/daycare to notify them that the batterer is not to pick up the child. Obtain an Order of Protection that prevents the batterer from contacting you. Notify your place of employment and share pictures of your batterer so you will be informed if your abuser tries to contact you at work. Ask another person to walk with you to your vehicle or bus stop, and vary your routes home.
In the event that a confrontation between you and your batterer is inevitable, move to a room or area with an exit. Always avoid the kitchen, bathroom, or a room containing weapons. Prepare for the confrontation before it occurs, even if you do not think such an event will happen. Ask your neighbors to call the police if they hear a disturbance, and devise a code word to share with family and friends that will alert them that you are in trouble and require assistance. Keep a bag packed and hidden in a readily accessible place, and devise a plan for where you will go if you must flee the residence. If you are in a dangerous situation, consider giving the batterer what he wants so you can escape without harm.
If you decide to leave the situation, plan carefully to increase your safety. Batterers often lash out when they believe that the victim is leaving the relationship. Think about where to go when you leave. Take important documents and items with you, such as your identification, driver's license, birth certificate, and social security card. Also take these items for your children, as well as their school and vaccination records. Take money, credit cards, welfare identification, work permits, Green Cards, passports, and important legal documents such as your divorce papers or Order of Protection. Take your keys to your vehicle, home, and workplace, bank papers, an address book, and items with sentimental value to you or your children.
Resources in Tucson
You are not alone. Several agencies and hotlines in Southern Arizona are there to assist victims of domestic violence. Law enforcement and emergency medical services can always be reached by dialing 911. Other resources are listed below:
Arizona Child Abuse or Neglect Hotline: 1-888-SOS-CHILD or 1-888-767-2445
Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence: 1-800-782-6400
Boys Town National Hotline: 1-800-448-3000
Brewster Center Crisis Hotline: 520-622-6347
Casa Amparo Crisis Hotline: 520-746-1501
Children's Crisis Services: 520-628-5241
Help on Call Crisis Hotline: 520-323-9373
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233
Parents Anonymous of Arizona Hotline: 1-800-352-0528
Regional Behavioral Health Services: 1-800-771-9889
Tohono O'odham Tribe (Sells, Arizona): 520-383-6300
Tohono O'odham Victims Witness: 520-383-4590
Southern Arizona Center Against Sexual Assault: 520-327-1171
Tucson Centers for Women and Children: 520-795-4266
Several agencies also operate safe houses or domestic violence shelters. The Brewster Center, Tucson Centers for Women and Children, and Casa Amparo all operate safe houses and can be reached at the above-listed numbers. Casa de los Ninos is a shelter exclusively for children and can be reached at 520-624-5600. Open Inn may be reached at 520-323-0200; Our Town Family Center at 520-323-1706, and the Salvation Army at 520-622-5411. Other resources may be available through your place of worship.
Good luck, and stay safe.
This articles relied on information obtained from the Clark County Prosecutor's Office (http://www.clarkprosecutor.org/html/domvio/domvio.htm), and the Tucson Centers for Women and Children (http://www.tucsoncenters.com/resources.htm).
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